Expecting Unexpectedly

Surprisingly, I'm expecting again! And very, very soon. I found out at the end of May that I was carrying another bundle due to arrive Feb 4th. That puts me currently at about 37 and half weeks! This was a complete shocker to my husband and I. Neither of us took the news very well; although, my husband hid it better. I was scared beyond belief about how we would afford the baby, what would work say and most importantly, what would my little baby boy think? I couldn't get over my mom guilt and still haven't. He was still a baby and deserved to be my (only) baby for at least another year or two. Finding out I was pregnant to me was like taking his babyhood away. He loves to snuggle with me and kiss me. I didn't want either of us to lose that bond because I'd be caring and focused on a newborn in a few short months.

Wow! was the first trimester difficult this time around. Not only was I extremely sick, but I had a soon to be 1 year old who never sat still for more than a minute. By the end of July he was up and down the stairs and even walking. Let me tell you throwing up and keeping your baby out of the toilet at the same time was no easy task.

 The second trimester was a pleasant surprise. I was able to relax and get as much sleep and rest as my son would let me. He still doesn't sleep through the night and he is 16 months old. I've decided anyone who says their baby is a good sleeper is a liar! Anyway, it gave me a chance to get excited about having another child.  My husband and I even decided or (I decided for us) that we weren't going to find out the sex this time around.  That has definitely kept things interesting and saved some money in my wallet.

Now, that I am approaching the final count down, I am beginning to have a lot of anxiety. I remember the hormones after childbirth and I was a blubbering mess, now mix that with mom guilt all the blogs tell me I am bound to feel and I can only imagine the wrath that will be unleashed on my husband for sure.  Sorry Hubby!